Baggage

I don't hold a lot of grudges, in fact I don't think that there is anyone in particular that I am mad at or really feel offended by. There are only a few things that a person can do that will summons the wrath of Dave. Admittedly in my past I haven't always been as easy going. It didn't take much for me to blow a fuse or add a person to my bad list. I am older now and a little more relaxed. Now don't get me wrong, I am not one of those people that sit around trying to remember people in my past that has done me wrong one way or another. I am grateful and hopeful that there aren't many people out there with a get-back, revenge mentality because I think that I would be in big trouble. I think that I would have my back against the wall most of the time. In fact one of my biggest regrets in life is how I treated a few people. I don't think that I was a terribly mean natured person but I know that there are a few people out there that in my weakness of youth probably inadvertently hurt and for that I am sorry.

Anyways back to my baggage. One person in particular that I thought of this morning that appears every now and then into my cloudy memory is a kid from my early early youth, in fact I don't even remember his name but I remember what he looked like, where he lived and what he was wearing the day he wronged me. Here's the story: When I was five years old I got to experience school for the first time. A part of my school memories that always stands out is riding the bus and hanging out at the bus stop. One particular day after school (remember I was in Kindergarten at the time) I got into a fight with a kid that was older than I was. I don't remember the fight very well but I am sure that it consisted of a few head locks and grass stains. If my recollection is correct I think that the older boy got the upper hand and it was over after a few minutes. I ended up walking with my older brother from the bus stop back up to the top of the culdesac to my home. No big deal right? Right. Fights when you are that age probably happen once a week. Now this is where the baggage come in. The next day after school the kid stopped me as we got off the bus and said, "hey, I'm really sorry about yesterday" and stuck his hand out for me to shake it. I remember feeling good that he was apologising so I reached out my hand and said "that's OK I'm" and WHAM! the kid belted me hard in the stomach. "OOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHH". Was all that I could say as he walked off. The wind was knocked completely out of me. I remember walking home crying. I do not have any more memories of this kid. I think he moved away shortly after that. Man what a dirty thing to do. I know that I shouldn't be carrying around baggage like that or even remembering stuff like that. I don't think about this very often maybe every three years it will creep its way back into my memory. Am I messed up because I still remember this? How do I get closure on something like this. I know that he was a little kid when he did this and little kids can be mean sometimes, but man. Maybe this little blog will bring some closure.

To that kid: I forgive you for belting me with a cheap shot, probably the biggest cheap shot a seven year old could dish out. I forgive you for being the dirty rotten fighter that your were when you were seven. Please forgive me for still wanting to beat you down like a rented mule.

OK, well I feel much better. So I guess I have shared with the world my baggage.

"Shall we forgive our neighbor until seven times?" And Jesus answered "Until seventy times seven".