Last night I think that I finally reached the Master Cleanse "mecca" or "nirvana" and finally crapped lemonade.
No longer will I sit in ranks with the rest of you, and of the free clogged boweled world. (Yes ladies and gentlemen my bowel is no longer hindered with the smelly peanut filled fecal matter that the rest of you turd banks have to carry on a daily basis.)
Does this make me better and cleaner than you?
Yes it does.
If someone were to tell me that I am full of crap, I can reply, "Well, actually I'm not, I'm full of lemonade."
Can you do that?
I don't think so.
Do your farts smell like lemonade?
Mine do.
In fact I don't even fart any more but if I did I'd bet a dollar that it would smell like lemonade.
Am I hungry?
I don't even know how to explain my hunger without using the F-word, so I won't. Needless to say, I am hungry very hungry.
I apologise for the insanity but that is the price you pay for a clean engine.
Ive got burgers to flip.
hasta burrito.
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5 comments:
Keep it going til the 23rd. I want to see what you look like.
Dude, I'm going to be lucky to make it through the next 23 minutes.
I'm worried about the lack of protein. I bet 50% of any of the weight loss is deteriated muscle.
I wrestled Wednesday and haven't felt any muscle recovery at all.
I shot an elk last week and can't even eat any meat. It's nearly killing me.
Now if there was a large wager involved I think I could hold out until the 23rd
You're doing good... keep it going!!
Large wager? You picked up that penny.....you make it til the 23rd and I'll not only feed you but give you 10 clams.
Not only 10 clams, I might let you fish with me this Spring. At the very least I'll let you carry my flyrod.
p.s. You didn't have much muscle anyway. Remember when I almost broke your forearm when we arm wrestled. Big wuss.
I give you two more days.
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